When eyes meet

It was the first time I met my mother since I returned to the Philippines. I wasn’t a bit nervous, just worried that her eyes might betray feelings contrary to her supportive words in her media interviews. After all, our eyes are the mouthpiece of our souls, of our intentions, of what is behind every utterance, of what beats beneath our skin. But feelings of worry aside, I was very excited to see her and for her to see BB, the daughter she always had.

So on 14 April the doors of our house in Parañaque opened to me. No words were needed. No explanations were demanded. No lips pursed. No facial lines twitched to reveal any sign of rejection. Our eyes did most of the talking. Right in front of me was just my mother’s opened heart radiating through her gentle smile. I saw in her eyes that she saw what my eyes have seen. And I have affirmed at that moment what I’ve always known: Her love has not staled. Suddenly the walls that are used to be between us transformed into bridges.

Then Richie, my youngest sibling, joined us. Richie and I grew up together; I even used to accompany her in her dance classes. It became the focus of the reminiscing we did all afternoon. Mama even narrated, even reenacted, how Richie struggled to dance tahitian with her stiff body. Now, I’m the one taking dance classes – not Tahitian though but ballet. My mother then encouraged me to just study in a nearby dance studio as they have a handsome dance instructor. It made us all laugh!

Unfortunately, my next appointment was already calling me. I then retouched my makeup; I did it in front of them. It was the first time they have seen me doing it. I didn’t plan to but the warmth I felt between us melted any fear within me to hide myself. Mama and Richie were just there watching me smear blush on my face and gloss my lips. Mama even asked what blush on I was using as she found it really good and natural. I told her it’s Shu Uemura. Time then ticked the last minutes of our meeting. But before I left, Mama borrowed my sunglasses and fitted them. Richie joked Mama looked like a bumblebee on it. Laughter punctuated our goodbye.

I left with a familiar joy in my heart. The joy I had felt the first time my heart opened its windows to the refreshing breeze of first love. The joy I always feel whenever I meet people who look beyond the image; under their gaze, one is like a fish that swims with playfulness and rapturous abandon. It is the joy that speaks when we just share time with someone: the tenderness of being there just to be there. It is the joy that is born whenever we share the same space with someone not as two separate individuals but as two intertwined souls. And this joy is one of those moments when ‘Life is Beautiful’ suddenly leaves the realm of cliché and enters the realm of the world from where the freshness of every great poem comes.