Friday, April 24, 2009

Time For Change!


“Rules,” Franklin D. Roosevelt once said, “are not necessarily sacred, principles are.” The incident that happened to me and my friends on the night of April 23 is an example of rules violating the principles which motivate humanity to live in equality, to treat each other with respect, and to uphold each other’s dignity.

I was all set to watch Rannie Raymundo’s show in Metrowalk. Dee and my assistant Sass were with me. I didn’t know where exactly in Metrowalk the show would be. So while I was on my way, I texted Maegan, who would also be watching with us. She told me that it was going to be in Aruba Bar & Restaurant. Upon hearing that it was going to be there, Sass brought up the unfortunate incident Inday Garutay experienced there. I heard it before but I didn’t know that it happened there. Feeling worried, I requested Sass to ask Aruba Bar & Restaurant whether they have any problem with me watching the show.

Sass talked to the bouncer of Aruba Bar & Restaurant but she was then referred to the manager. She asked Sass: “What is she wearing?” Sass told her that I was wearing what every modest woman wears. The manager then iterated the blatant “No Crossdressing” policy hanging on their door. Sass refused to accept her reasoning. The manager then offered to consult the owner of the bar. The manager returned and gave a compromise: We can stay outside of Aruba Bar & Restaurant. Sass left and narrated what she was told. We left Metrowalk and transferred into a bar that understands that bigotry is not a sound business strategy.

I have felt perhaps the same feeling Rosa Parks felt when she was asked to give up her seat so a white passenger could sit. We, and countless human beings like me, suffered and are continue suffering the same indignity of discrimination: Rosa Park was discriminated because of her skin color; human beings of transgender experience are being discriminated because of their gender identity, the deeply felt internal and individual experience of gender, which of course does not always match the sex assigned by the doctors upon our birth.

I wasn’t demanding any special treatment from them. I was just there looking forward to enjoy the music and performance of Rannie, just like any other human being inside their bar. Certainly, I dressed up as a woman because I am a woman. If I dressed up in a masculine way, that would be the time that I would be crossdressing. But let’s discard all the labels, it’s not the issue. I am a human being just like yourself, just like the owners of Aruba Bar & Restaurant. I’m a human being denied of her right to express her unique existence.

What special right does Aruba Bar & Restaurant have that they can just force human beings to conform their gender expression to the gender expression traditionally associated with their assigned sex at birth? What special right does Aruba Bar & Restaurant have that they can just inflict indignity on their fellow human beings? What special right does Aruba Bar & Restaurant have that they can just enforce such transphobic policies with impunity?

I don’t understand where they are getting these special rights. My Christian upbringing has instilled in me one of the two greatest principles Jesus Christ deemed to be the commandments at which all commandments bow. This principle is also common in all spiritual teachings: “Thou shall love thy neighbor as thyself”.

We can also find this same principle in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights: “All human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights. They are endowed with reason and conscience and should act towards one another in a spirit of brotherhood (Article 1). And “everyone is entitled to all the rights and freedoms…, without distinction of any kind, such as race, colour, sex, language, religion, political or other opinion, national or social origin, property, birth or other status (Article 2).” This is also echoed in the Yogyakarta Principles: “All human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights. Human beings of all sexual orientations and gender identities are entitled to the full enjoyment of all human rights (Article 1).”

Even the Philippine Constitution upholds this: “The State values the dignity of every human person and guarantees full respect for human rights. (Article II, Section 11).” Jesus Christ was all about love, compassion, and inclusion and never about discrimination. The Philippine Constitution and international law are all about upholding the dignity of each human being regardless of who and what they are.

Without a need for complicated mental calisthenics, discriminatory rules, practices, and policies are very incompatible with these principles. And history has shown that rules, practices and policies constantly change so society can fulfill the highest principles of humanity: women getting the vote, end of apartheid, outlawing child abuse, to name a few.

So what special right does Aruba Bar & Restaurant have that they can just enforce rules that violate these principles of humanity? What special right does Aruba Bar & Restaurant have that they can continue doing business like this for years? Since when did a business license become a license to violate human rights? Does my gender identity & expression violate their right to conduct their business in a socially responsible way? Why are we turning a blind eye to this inhumanity?

Enforcing gender conformity is not, and will never be, a corporate social responsibility; ending discrimination is. Philippines, it’s NOW time for change.

Love & Peace,
Ms. BB Gandanghari

134 comments:

  1. shit BB!! y do dey have to do dat to u??!?! u dont deserve dat!! grabe uminit ulo ko don!! my pera ka, my breeding ka, muka kang tao, edukada at respetado!! tapos gaganonin ka nila kasi gay ka?? dat is so inhumane!! masama ang loob ko sa ginawa nila sayo!! :( makakarma cla mkkita mo BB!!! :(

    ReplyDelete
  2. While Aruba can say that it is their “right” to refuse entry to people and to choose their customers, they do not have the right to discriminate against anyone. They do not have the right to trample on anyone’s dignity just because that person does not conform with their narrow-minded culture and upbringing. They do not have the right to treat anyone with less respect just because that person is not up to par with their moral standards. What is Aruba so afraid of that they resort to transphobia? I wonder how people can be so afraid of our beautiful transgender sisters.

    ReplyDelete
  3. when will our people ever learn to respect on human dignity? I hope the Phil government or its counterparts may eventually realize such!

    ReplyDelete
  4. people can be so cruel. :( its saddens me alot. as much i want to be calm and all.. i just wanna take that sign-board and shove it up their asses. THEY ARE SO CRUEL. ugh. Aruba bar is really getting on my nerves...

    careful with another bar... cafe havana...

    xoxo,
    kel

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hello there. It's so sad that there's so much discrimination and bigotry these days. It will take a while for them to open up their eyes so it will be quite a frustrating ordeal.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Wow! They refuse entry to a transgender but readily welcomes the SKANKS (pokpok) or mga DRUG ADIK...

    I wonder what kind of people these owners are...

    ReplyDelete
  7. It's really disheartening to learn that these things go on over there as well. There just is no excuse for us to be treating each other this way. I'm in L.A. and when discrimination of this sort takes place in the queer community to queers themselves, we've found that keeping the bigoted business from our hard-earned "datung" works wonders!!! So, IMHO, y'all might think of BOYCOTTING this establishment. Just a suggestion lang, dearies. Sometimes the shortest route to achieving tolerance for one's self and one's community is to demand it loudly and vehemently! TRANNY POWER, yo!!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. My girlfriend, who is also transgendered, referred me to this blog. When I read it, it almost brought tears to my eyes and I could not agree with you more on the points that you made. That kind of blatant discrimination is disgraceful. It should not be tolerated. It reminds me of my youth in apartheid South Africa, when black people were not allowed to enter white owned shops or go to whites only parks. I remember some priest trying to justify such a policy by quoting narrowly from the bible and completely missing the point about the tolerance and love that the bible teaches. There are principles that are inherent in humans by virtue of being human and those principles can never be alienated. Human dignity and equality are perhaps the most fundamental of those, and no man-made law can trump it. I certainly will never give such a place my business. Shame on them!

    Chris

    ReplyDelete
  9. up to 60 years ago women in trousers were considered cross-dressers. Do these people also have a problem with priests in their cassocks?

    Rather than simply boycotting the establishment, why not mass up and make a mockery of their "dress code"?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Time and again, this is a clear violation of human rights.Until now my brain cells cant fathom why Aruba, has this kind of rule!

    Lets urge congress to pass the anti discrimination bill now or if not, its about time to bring Ang Ladlad and Danton Remoto to congress.

    Managot ang mga tao at mga establisyamentong yumurak sa ating pagkatao!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I am a married female heterosexual, pero uminit din ang ulo ko sa discrimination na ito. To think, hindi naman malakas ang Aruba. Let's start a text brigade calling for its boycott para mas madali ikalat.

    ReplyDelete
  12. First let us refrain from criticizing ARUBA using teh words pokpok, etc. just like the TG's they also are humans. We can never correct a discriminatory act by discriminating others.

    This incident is an outright act of discrimination and we know that. It happened to Inday Garutay before, now to Ms. Gandanghari. What should we do? I think it is high time we ensure that jurisprudence will be written on this issue. High time to prove the existence of pink peso. BOYCOTT ARUBA & FILE A CLASS SUIT (test case)the policy is a violation of the human rights of transgenders to self expression.

    ReplyDelete
  13. With a military that is only now "considering" to allow homosexuals into their ranks, I find it sad that this country has a long way to go.

    You're right. This has to change.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Rather sad... :s
    Change should happen soon...

    ReplyDelete
  15. even if the law does not recognize what happened as an illegal form of discrimination, the action of the owner clearly lacks good business judgment and shows his own doubt about his gender identity. very tragic.

    ReplyDelete
  16. BOYCOTT ARUBA. DEMAND JUSTICE, BB. YOU HAVE THE NAME. THE TG COMMUNITY NEEDS A FAMOUS FACE LIKE YOU TO STOP TRANSPHOBIA. KUNG DI NGAYON, KAILAN PA? KUNG DI TAYO, SINO PA PA BA? TAMA NA. WE NEED CHANGE. MY BLOOD IS BOILING.

    ReplyDelete
  17. SKIN COLOR or RACE is not a choice, but cross-dressing is. We should respect everyone's choice, and for that, we should also respect the choice of the ARUBA management. Aruba is not the only establishment to go to for a night out, anyone can always go somewhere. I am not transphobic, I respect everyone, straight, gay, rich, poor, black, white, brown, yellow, but also be educated enough to respect some establishments' policies. You wouldn't want anyone smoking in a NON-SMOKING place, right? And don't tell me that my last statement is totally different from the issue.

    PEACE EVERYONE! :D

    ReplyDelete
  18. is Mr. Respect Everyone working in Aruba Bar .. sounds like..
    This kind of establishment shouldn't have opened if they're not willing to accept people from all walks of life, eh di mag tayo na lang sila ng bar sa bahay nila there they can do that...
    Iba ba ang kulay ng pera ng transgender sa pera nyo? hindi naman nanggugulo ang tao so you no right to treat them as such..
    arte-arte nyo sa transgender eh dami nyo namang poks na pinapasok sheesshh wa's up wit dat dude?
    u want PEACE with everyone??? then No DISCRIMINATION,EQUAL HUMAN RIGHTS FOR TG!!

    Love ya BB

    ReplyDelete
  19. I'd like to thank everyone who expressed their support. I deeply appreciate your concern and care. People like you have been the source of my courage. However, there are people who don't seem to understand the issue. Like Mr. Respect Everyone.

    Sir, I do appreciate your opinion. Indeed, Skin Color or Race is not a choice. And certainly you got it right about bars banning "Smokers" inside their bar. But let me just clarify different things.

    First, I'm not crossdressing. I'm not a man wearing women's clothes. I'm a woman wearing women's clothes. What I am right now is not a product of "choice" akin to choosing what food I want to eat. This is a product of self-discovery and whatever I discover is not a choice. You'll know this if you have gone through the wonderful experience of discovering your inner life. What I am right now is a manifestation of what's inside of me.

    Second, smoking is banned inside the bars because there's a law banning it and it is medically proven that passive smoking is much more dangerous than active smoking. Now Sir, Is it scientifically proven that my presence, or the presence of human beings like me, will in danger the health of other customers?

    And third, believing in a particular faith, holding a particular political belief, are also considered choices. YET you cannot discriminate people based on their faith and political beliefs. Can you allow the existence of a bar that will refuse entry to their customers because of their religion or political beliefs? NO.

    And with this, I rest my case. That's all.

    Love & Peace,
    BB

    ReplyDelete
  20. BB! pls dont ever change kahit madami umaapi sayo. kasi madaming nanlalait sayo and stuff lyk dat lage mo iicpn na madami ding nagmamahal sayo.. fan ako ni rustom and up to now kahit iba na ang direksyon na gustong puntahan ng dating rustom i still accept u for who u are. bakit ka namen pipilitin maging rustom kung sa pagiging BB ka masaya. kung masaya ka.. kameng mga loyal at sincere fans mo happy dn. kaya be strong! WE LOVE YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE!! :)

    ReplyDelete
  21. as i was saying all along, they are beneath you BB.... we are behind you in this crusade!

    ReplyDelete
  22. ang kakapal naman ng aruba bar na yan!! hindi naman kasikatan tapos gumaganyan pa!! BB dont be affected sa nangyare! lamo dapat nga dey should be honored na isang katulad mo na very lapitin sa media eh gustong pumunta sa bar nila tapos iddiscriminate ka nila ng ganon!! no wonder mas madaming tao na mas gugustuhin na lang mag SM kesa mag ARUBA! sirang sira na image nila! hindi na ba sila nadala sa nangyare ky inday garutay!! manhid na cla.. palibhasa namatay na lang bigla yung issue about inday kaya lumakas ulit loob nila.. BB.. paglaban mo rights mo! wag mong hayaang mamatay na lang issue ng ganon na lang na hindi natututo ng lesson ang aruba!! more power bb!! make us all proud by fighting for ur rights kasi kahit hindi ako bakla mahal na mahal ko ang mga bading lalo na yung mga kagalang galang na bading like u!! i love u

    ReplyDelete
  23. once pinanganak kang boy.. boy ka forever.baliktarin man ang earth. it will never change people. I'm not againts gays, i love them nga eh kasi super saya nilang kasama. just want to point the fact.. na once you're a girl.. girl k n forever and pag boy.. boy ka na.and if you are born gay.. gay k n rin forever. dehins n mababago yun.

    ReplyDelete
  24. I think its wonderful that a celebrity like you us able to put attention to a topic that is quite relevant around the world right now. It gives a voice to all those oppressed.

    with the recent hullaballoo with Ms. California answer regarding gay marriage I think its safe to say that a large portion of the society still can not embrace everyone rights.

    you know, weve always had the power to choose.
    whether you want to be someone different from what is expected. we always had that kind of power and nothing can take that away from us.

    my point is:
    "If as a child, you can choose what toy you could play with
    If as teenager you could choose which friends to join with
    If as a student you can choose what course you want to take
    and If as an adult you could choose whatkind of job you would take.
    I dont see why we cant choose who we love or WHAT to love. or what we want to be".

    its fundamental to understand that, as long as we have that respect for our neighbor, as long as we dont hurt anyone, we can be who we want to be.

    and its sad that some people take that away from those who are willing to find happiness for themselves.

    as emmy rossum said, "love for everyone".

    ReplyDelete
  25. kasi mukha kang bastusin kaya di ka pinapasok....ka cheapan girl.

    ReplyDelete
  26. BB hindi ka woman your a gay, ano man ang naging discovery mo sa life mo that means you realize or sinunod mo kung ano ang nasapuso mo, pero hindi ka magiging woman sa lifetime mo kasi isinilang ka ng man you have to accept that kahit mag-paopera ka MAN ka pa din, hindi ako narrow minded i totaly accept gays pero huwag mo sasabihin woman ka kasi hindi talaga, kahit sa mata ni GOD "MAN" ka pa din kahit ang puso mo ay "WOMAN". the bar doesn't really discriminate they owned the place probably their building a persona for their business, its like going to a formal party they would not allow people to come wearing flipflops, if the bar prefer to have their guest wear proper clothes that belongs to their gender it's their prerogative because maybe they want to build a persona to their bar, but that doesn't mean your discriminated. kasi if you just wear as how john lapuz wear to just follow their dresscode it wouldn't be a problem. think of it as you just wear a flipflops, it means your not allowed to enter, is there a law banning flipflops? the bar principles/dress-code rule make sense and i dont see it as one form of discrimination. it's just a mere bar law that people doesn't want to follow.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Weng from SingaporeApril 25, 2009 at 6:04 PM

    Hiya girl,
    Don't despair...dont patronize this place...absolutely waste of time and money. I salute you for your courage and pride in what and who you are. Hang in there.

    ReplyDelete
  28. "First, I'm not crossdressing. I'm not a man wearing women's clothes. I'm a woman wearing women's clothes."- errr...wherever you got this idea from? Yes you are a man wearing women's clothes! You may have converted yourself to be GAY but you are NOT a woman, as you were born a man and nothing will EVER change that. You may 'want' to be a woman and dress totally like a woman but the sooner you tell yourself and accept that you are only a man converted to gay, the easier it may be for other people to accept what you chose to be. I have nothing against homosexuals as I myself am a lesbian but I am not a cross dresser (not to say I have anything against people who prefer to "dress the part") and I respect that some people have a certain dislike for these and if we want people to respect our choices we should respect the choices they make as well (be it personal or business). True as it may seem though, the Philippines has quite a long way to go on the homosexuality front.

    ReplyDelete
  29. i-boycott ang aruba bar na yan!

    wag kayo pumunta jan mga sis!

    go team BB! :)

    ReplyDelete
  30. Wow, first let me welcome you to the Blogosphere! It's good to see more and more celebrities and personalities reaching out via the internet.

    Wrote about this at New Media Philippines as well: http://www.newmedia.com.ph/bb-gandanghari-starts-blogging/

    It's a very well written article you have here and I'm sure you will get a lot of supporters for this cause. However you will also get doubters/haters. The thing about blogging is that it's very interactive and it's two-way. People will flood your entries with comments especially since you're a celebrity.

    I hope this doesn't discourage you and that you will continue blogging in the months and years to come. Don't let them pull you down and just keep on writing.

    Suggest you already think about your commenting policy. :) Your blog, your rules.

    Again, welcome to the blogosphere and I hope that you resolve things with Aruba soon.

    All the best,
    Carlo

    ReplyDelete
  31. gawd!!!! IPASARA NA YANG ARUBITCH NA YAN! me history na pala mang discriminate e! lolz :-D

    ReplyDelete
  32. props to you for being true to who you really are, even if you know that there are schmucks out there who hide their ignorance under this shroud of contempt and bigotry... extremely brave, extremely beautiful.. you are one cool lady

    ReplyDelete
  33. Nice Blog....

    Well, napakacruel naman ng bar na iyan...

    Kung ikaw nga na kilala nagawa nila 'yan...

    'dun pa kaya sa mga unknown? Hehe :)

    Sana may patunguhang maganda ang issue na ito.

    Goodluck sa pagbablog mo. God Bless....

    ReplyDelete
  34. just a quick note for people who are struggling to understand gender and sexuality concepts;

    YES thats you Anonymous Lesbian and Mr Respect Everyone

    1) Cross dressing is an action or a behaviour and sometimes seen as a type of transgender behavior.

    It does not, however, necessarily indicate transgender identity; a person who cross-dresses does not always identify as having a gender different from that assigned at birth.

    2) Gender Identity Dysphoria is BB's condition And as it suggests it pertains to gender not sexuality, that is whether you like boys girls or both as sexual partners.

    Gender Identity means that BB is identifying with a gender different from birth or assigned at birth. Assigned means that a child is born with non-gender specific or ambiguous external genitalia and thus assigned a gender according to medical advice; examples are intersexed babies, XXY chromosomal abnormalities

    3) being GAy=lesbian / homosexual has got nothing to do with Gender Identity. Thats why some can be transgendered women and still like women as sexual partners. Meaning they are transgendered women in a lesbian relationship.

    Some can be transgendered women and like to be with a straight man and so they are in a straight relationship with a straight male.

    In conclusion

    DONOT call BB GAY because first its none of our business who she sleeps with and second it just makes you look stupid.

    Second BB has never CONVERTED herself. It is scientifically proven with countless research that identity dysphoria is from conception/birth MEANING that YES IDIOTS, GOD did create transgendered people too. Its just arrogance on your behalf to believe that straight people like you are created by GOD. Hello straight people gave birth to homosexuals, straights bisexuals trysexuals transgendered people and intersex people ... DUH!

    certainly I donot believe in this lifetime that when My father Impregnated my mother that GOD exclusively made me hetero.

    To anyone who want to make insulting comments please be aware that if you haven't had a chromosome analysis you dont really know that you are a male or female. So be quite with your insults.

    BB also never had a choice MISS LESBIAN. Do you think that people like her want to dress up because they want and are in need of the ridicule and insults you and your ilks venomously spit every opportunity you get. The sniggering lascivious remarks and innuendos and blatant discrimination from people like you???

    Hopefully you'll never be discriminated for being a lesbian and if you do its called KARMA.

    AND Miss lesbian and Mr Nice Everyone if both of you are not really stupid please go here:

    http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/272173/xxy_sex_chromosomes_gender_identity.html

    ReplyDelete
  35. Go BB fight for your rights, every human deserve respect...no matter what's their status in life... YOU'RE an INSPPRATION TO MANY. GO!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Please do not compare yourself to Rosa Parks...you even quoted Franklin Roosevelt? Rules are rules...the bar is not the whole country...if the bar was Pegasus and you were not allowed to go in would you have complained...clearly you are not complaining because of your Rights...but your pride...your a rich guy...Im sure you can be in Paris if you want to, in a heart beat...lighten up dude...

    ReplyDelete
  37. As what the the Aruba Bar Management said they have reserve the right to refuse entry to those who are inappropriately dressed, threat to security, mentally depraved etc.... it is very clear.The security / bouncer and management are right not to allow BB or else could be a joke once inside.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Go BB Go! You rock my rainbow! Sana mag Twitter ka na and we'll follow YOU everywhere :D

    ReplyDelete
  39. BB Crossdresser ka... U we're know before as rustom....

    ReplyDelete
  40. Gosh... You know BB... What you are doing is so very cheapetic...

    ReplyDelete
  41. BB, rules are rules. If they will let you in then for sure other cross dressers might sue them for being too picky. Lets be straight, as long as you still have that male genitalia definitely they treat and see you as a male. No woman has a shaft hanging between their legs. You too doubted yourself when you asked your assitant to ask them. You even emphasized that Inday Garutay crossed your mind. If you felt that you were a woman that night you should have not asked your assitant to seek permission. No woman would ask their assitant to check if they could get in. You said you are a woman deep inside but remember you are in the philippines, they are not as open like the first world countries. Am sorry but this time I think you should have not dragged Ms. Park here because hers was entirely a different story. At least you didn't create a scene which was very ethical of yours. Just ignore them, try not to go to bars with such restrictions or perhaps next time you should speak with the owner or the manager days or weeks beforahand to refrain such things. Rules are rules, some are just used of breaking them.

    Anyway, it is not your fault. Filipino people should start embracing homos.

    ReplyDelete
  42. BB , I think ure of the most respectable gays here n the Phil.u have breeding.. di ka katulad ng ibang bakla na bastos.all i can say's u dnt deserve to be treated that way.they are so narrow minded! palibhasa palugi na yan aruba bar ekek na yan and napaka trying hard naman sus! anyways, i admire u still BB Gandanghari mabuhay ka!

    ReplyDelete
  43. Mr. Rustom Padilla, who gave you the right to call yourself a woman? Baliktarin mo man ang mundo, ipinanganak kang lalaki hangang sa kamatayan, lalaki ka pa rin. Kung gusto mo ng respeto, respetohin mo muna ang mga katulad nyo. Like Mr. Boy Abunda, he is gay, respetadong tao, aminadong gay siya and he's proud of it but never did he consider himself a woman and cross-dress. You are gay by nature, accept it and people will respect you.
    Now who gave you the right to call yourself a woman? Mr Rustom Padila....

    ReplyDelete
  44. Hey, ive read all the comments including the blog of bb gandanghari, well,.guys, i understand both sides, with the aruba bar and resto, its just their rules, it must be followed of course, cause rules are rules. every establishments like schools, churches, bars, even airports have their own rules, if you want to use their property, abide and obey them,. Nothing to loose, right? but what im not into is the thing that can hurt others. i can accept the "no flipflops? Jerseys, or hats of any kind" but what are they trying to tell? Gays are fun to be with, ive got loads of gayfriends and they gave life to the party. As for the side of bb, you know i cant blame you if you'd got hurted by the said bar, i mean, you are just being true to yourself and im really proud of you, you didnt expect that the venue would be so strict with their rules, i mean if the venue would be in other place or in other bar that dont have that kind of attitude towards the customers, well nothing would have happen right? and please bb gandanghari may be considered as an icon, she is famous. Why on earth would they let the big opportunity slip away? It could be a big publicity to your bar, and would have magnet alot of customers,.

    So now, aruba bar and resto could be out of the industry soon enough, lets just be frank, no one would want to go in a bar or even a resto that has a history of rejecting a popular customer. And giving a bad attitude to them, its a publicity alright.. -a bad one.

    bb can believe or feel that she is a woman, maybe...a woman trap in a man's body. this is a free country, all can do what they want right? so let us respect her decisions in life. She may be a public property because she's famous and a star but all have human rights and lets not go beyond the limits and try not to discriminate them. Not only bb, but same goes to all the gays and lesbians.

    May God help you be enlighten and understand the facts. These are just my own opinion. If ive hurted anyone. Im sorry.

    ReplyDelete
  45. That is SO WRONG.
    GAWD.

    You know what. NEVER go back to Aruba again. What kind of management is that? There's nothing wrong gay! People nowadays forget the word RESPECT. What's wrong with cross-dressing? Are they gonna burn when you dress that way?

    What the hell are they doing.

    ReplyDelete
  46. may blogspot pala si bb gandanghari...

    asteeg ah...

    add kita sa list ko...x-link..tnx..

    Peace...

    ReplyDelete
  47. Hi BB, i was starstruck when I saw you in Serendra, you looked fabulous!
    Damn the owners of Aruba..who do they think they are? They should even be proud you are entering their bar!
    More power BB and stay as beautiful as ever.
    p.s. next time i see you, i will have the guts to have my pic taken with you, i was too ashamed in Serendra as you were with Gretchen, Tonyboy, Marjorie, etc.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Lighten up, girl. (And everyone here, for that matter!) As what one commenter said (and I agree wholeheartedly with you!) Aruba is not the whole country. If it wasn't just your pride, then you could have easily shrugged off the whole incident (instead of being angry) because you couldn't care less what one establishment (or everyone else, for that matter) thinks of you. This, after all, is all part of the lifestyle you chose. If you have your rights to choose how you live your life, that establishment has the right to choose how it runs its business and who it will do business with. Now, if you were spoken down to, or ignored, or snubbed, or ridiculed, then that's a different matter. But it seems nothing of this sort happened. So everyone, let's just live and let live, shall we? :)

    -anita

    ReplyDelete
  49. Guys, you must understand that there are establishments like say casinos, elite bars that enforce dress codes. The matter is a simple issue of Mr. Padilla not complying with the company's policy pertaining to dress code. It is never an issue of discrimination. Aruba allows homos to enter there business premise. It saddens me that this trivial incident is being turned into a "human rights" and "discrimination" issue by Mr. Padilla. If we cannot submit to a simple policy being implemented by a business establishment, then we are free to move to others which conforms with our style of clothing or as Mr Padilla says, expression of human uniqueness. Marami na pong problema ang ating bansa. Ito ay simpleng pagkakaunawaan lang. Sana ay maging bukas ang ating isip at puso sa pagharap sa simpleng di pagkakaunawaan na ito. Lastly, comparing the incident to what Rosa Parks has experience in the then discriminative American society is an utter exaggeration. It is non sequitur!

    ReplyDelete
  50. another point to be made is that the bar operates under the protection of the laws that allow businesses to operate. by running a public accommodation business, a bar owner loses his private right to associate with and exclude others based upon his own poor business judgment. to allow otherwise would allow people with money to create parallel (private) public spaces, through business licensing, that lacked the important social goal of integration of different sectors in society. Mr Respect Everyone is wrong in as far as, a business operating a public accommodation does not have the same right as a private individual to pick and choose every person they come into contact with -- that is one of the responsibilities that runs with the benefit of getting a business license.

    ReplyDelete
  51. filipino mindset is still a fetus for a person like you. they still have a long way to go before they can accept change.

    ReplyDelete
  52. BB, you are the best person to file a class suit against Aruba. What happened was just so wrong and not to do anything to correct it would be equally unfortunate. Aruba cannot justify such policy, because it diminishes and violates a much higher policy- the law of equality. Nobody should be subject to such inhumane discrimination.

    Aruba definitely does not have any special right to enforce such unfair business policy. It (and perhaps some other establishment) is getting away with it though, because of the "macho" culture in the Philippine society- many people who read such kind of policy at the entrance of any establishment will likely just laugh it off, joke about it, or accept it and go away. Few people will question it, a fewer still who will do something about it.

    Please think about suing this business establishment, and please think about what impact a class suit can have in this country. Winning the suit will set a landmark precedence and prevent other establishments from making such unfair regulation.

    World peace.

    ReplyDelete
  53. It is indeed sad that people would implement such lame policy such as the 'no cross dressing code'. I urge you to bring the matter to court so that it would set a precedent.

    ReplyDelete
  54. I do not agree that Arruba denied you of being able to enjoy the show and dine in as anybody else does, but you are not a woman, honey. You are a man who did choose to give in to your desires to be a woman.

    ReplyDelete
  55. TO ALL THE ANONYMOUS POSTERS,

    HIDE BEHIND THE ANONYMITY AND SAY BAD THINGS ABOUT BB, THE FACT IS YOU'VE GOT NO BALLS... MAYBE YOU NEED ALL TO SHUT UP.

    ReplyDelete
  56. Hi BB! I believe this is one of those things on a long list that makes us Filipinos stucked to where we are right now. Is it wrong to be the individual you are? Or is it because people can't accept the fact that things do change? Frankly, I really don't have that big question mark on top of my head questioning your individuality. We are all humans and we all have our own identity. If there are people who can't accept this then maybe they have a problem with their own identity.

    Nice to see you blogging BB and keep on rocking!

    ReplyDelete
  57. That shouldn't be tolerated. That is a blatant disregard of human right's. Good thing I have never heard of that facility. (after the inday garutay incident O just completely forgot about it.) They should receive consequences for such prejudice.

    ReplyDelete
  58. haha...

    if u want others to respect YOU!you shud have know how to respect them as well.And it's clearly indicated that cross dressing is not allowed,it's been posted since the business started.So i don't think BB gndang hari have the right to react this way.

    ReplyDelete
  59. BB, you chose this path now start to accept the consequences.

    ReplyDelete
  60. You know, this is too elementary, kahit saang lugar meron mga rules na dapat na sinusunod, that's how we bring order in this world, chaotic na nga, tapos mag aalsa ka pa? Ke naging bastusin ka or hindi sa reactions mo nung andun ka sa Aruba, hindi pa rin tama na nagsisintimyento ka ng ganito, alam mong lalake ka, naka tatak yan sa birth certificate mo, kung katulad ng sinasabi mo ay may awakening kang nararanasan ngayon, dapat kasama yang awakening na yan na hindi lahat ng tao matatanggap ang pagbabago mo ng choice ng gender mo, rules are there to keep order of things, hindi yon for inhumane treatment na katulad ng pinapalabas mo, be fair pa rin BB, tinanggap ka ng mga tao as you are, sana wag naman over-reacting just because of one bar, tapos these commenter wanted the bar to close down or something? eh sige tama ang mga reactions mo, pero paano yung mga tao na nagtatrabaho doon? pahirap ng pahirap ang economy natin, sana wag kang maging dahilan ng lalong kahirapan ng mga taong hindi nararanasan na manood ng concerts na katulad mo, buti ka nga may mga wantons, eh yung mga employee doon na naghirap na makapasok para magkatrabaho? please think of your actions too...

    ReplyDelete
  61. If I owned a bar or restaurant. I'll make sure BB Gandanghari and all ye cross-dressers get in!

    BB rocks, and so does her brother Robin.

    ReplyDelete
  62. They have absolutely no idea of how incredibly fabulous and superbly chic your fashion is.

    xxx

    ReplyDelete
  63. i have to stop reading some of the post for one reason. some posted bigoted IDEAS.

    my only advice if you are not the person in authority to discuss gender and sexuality please stop that. To the anonymous lesbian and other anonymous posts and that of mr. respect - ignorance is not an excuse to discrimination. I suggest read some more books and learn before you make such comments.

    these comments and what happened is just a reflection of the LGBT community and our society as a whole - bigoted & discriminating. Discrimination exists within the LGBT community and most of the time, the TG's are the most oppressed and underrepresented. I guess this needs to be stopped and teh comments posted here by anonymour critics, be brave enough, show your identity and lets debate on this issue wetehr on sociological or legal perspectives.

    ReplyDelete
  64. nervermind the place BB,. Laos mna rin nmn un.

    ReplyDelete
  65. They have absolutely no idea of how incredibly fabulous and superbly chic your fashion is. Go to other places where people will appreciate it.

    xxx

    ReplyDelete
  66. If I owned a bar and restaurant, I'd make sure BB Gandanghari and all ye cross dressers get in!

    BB rocks, and so does her brother Robin :)

    ReplyDelete
  67. elow bb my idol.i hope u can visit me here in bacolod.

    www.mugazine.blogspot.com

    hope we can chat.tc

    ReplyDelete
  68. Hey thats totally ABSURD! ARUBA Bar is rubbish! CROSS DRESSING?I cant believe this is happening in MANILA, of all places. All I can figure from this crazy rule is that, its a total DISCRIMINATION AGAINST HOMOSEXUALS or maybe the owners of the bar had a HUGE FEAR w/ GAYS. BB you dont deserve ARUBA's shit and all. I grew up in MANILA's coolest bars in the 90's like MARS, EUPHORIA, & FACES. Gays go in & have fun on these bars wearing the coolest dress , w/ out any freakin problem or so. Now I live in the coolest party place on the planet, LAS VEGAS. In anytime I've been here my gay pals dont experience that shit, but sorry I cant compare MANILA from VEGAS. But all Im sayin is that, CROSS-DRESSING RULE is completely non-sense! I hope MANILA can still party & have fun w/ out freakin-out against GAYS, you now what I'm sayin!
    Oh by the way, I'm a straight guy w/ the coolest gay friends. BB i think you're cool!

    ReplyDelete
  69. Goodbye Aruba, tapos a masasayang araw niyo.

    ReplyDelete
  70. just don't go to a place that you're not welcome.

    ReplyDelete
  71. YOU CAN'T CALL A WOMAN WHO WEARS JEANS THAT ARE "MADE FOR WOMEN". SOME PEOPLE JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT CROSS-DRESSING MEANS. SINABIHAN KA NA NGA NA BAWAL BAKIT NAGPUPUMILIT PA.

    ReplyDelete
  72. i think social establishments such as bars and clubs should remove their "no crossdressing" rule. it doesn't even make sense, the thing is, it just define cross dressers are no way in the society. i've been in the aruba once and nilalangaw ang place. sana langawin kau ng tuluyan.!! i mean it..

    ReplyDelete
  73. ang OA. if you're not welcome. dont go. period. people of the philippines stop using human rights violation sa mga ka OA yan nio s buhay. Kaya hindi tayo umusad usad. rules are rules. wag ng ipilit kung ayaw.

    ReplyDelete
  74. This is such wake up call. We Filipinos pride ourselves as being open-minded, tolerant, respectful... hell, we even delude our kids at school to thinking we are the most hospitable people in the world. Reading all these heavily bigoted ideas and comments above simply proves the fact that we still have a long way to go in becoming a nation that understands gender equality and human rights.

    People who think cross dressing is just a matter choice of clothes clearly do not understand gender and sexuality issues, and should best keep it shut. You are simply showing how uneducated and simplistic you are. Please read up on your psychology. There's wikipedia too, which is free. Or ask your better educated friends before you speak.

    To people who say this is too elementary and that rules are rules, that is called blind obedience. To equate the situation to a policy prohibiting the use of flip flops is plain ridiculous. You can easily change your shoes, or leave the hats home, or change your short pants, but you cannot at the snap of the fingers change your sexuality. Again, there is more to cross dressing than just clothes, deeper issues are at play, and please don't let your ignorance hurt other people's feelings. Think before you speak.

    It is okay for an establishment to protect the sensibilities of the other customers. I will even say it's okay to bar someone who is looking for trouble, who is mentally imbalanced, and who is scandalous. But to automatically assume that transgendered people are looking for trouble and will definitely create a scandal... is plain bigotry. This is the key issue. This is 100% pure discrimination and you are fooling yourself if you think it isn't.

    To people who say that cross dressers better stick to the policy or they will shock other customers' sensibilities or risk being laughed at, you are definitely not getting the point. To accept such kind of unfair policy promotes discrimination- it gives the message that yes, to cross dress is insane, and that to laugh at people who cross dress is okay. Instead of showing the same kind of hospitality to transgendered people, you are actually saying it is fine to laugh at them, and that they are asking for it. If you are one of the heterosexual customers in that bar, and you see BB dressed in how any modest woman should dress, and you laugh and ridicule her, that is clearly wrong. What is worse is for the bar to have a policy that promotes such discrimination by denying her entry.

    To people who ask BB to stop comparing herself with Rosa Parks or quoting Roosevelt, BB has every right to do so, just as you have every right in the world to compare yourself with the bus driver who asked Parks to give up her seat. BB was merely proving a point, and she was not even comparing her total self to Parks, she was merely saying she may have experienced the same kind of injustice, which she really did.

    It's a painful realization that there are still so many people in the Philippines who have a one sided view of equality, and all the while claiming we are a God-fearing nation and that we as a country promote human rights.

    SHAME ON US.

    ReplyDelete
  75. ARUBA - A Place of Self-Claimed Discriminative Bigots

    This is a reposted entry.

    http://foxyreign.livejournal.com/109893.html

    It also happened to me, same thing with BB Gandanghari and Inday Garutay and maybe to a number of individuals who also has the constitutional rights to be treated fairly like heterosexuals.

    I may have just ignored and applied my attitude of being apathetic when this incident happened but as more people become more affected and concerned, I should have done something right, not to correct, but at least to let the people know that their policy is dumpsite trashy.

    It amazes me how women claimed their equal rights - I firmly believe that this is the right time to claim ours.


    Mood: Determined
    Location: NY Mansions Condo
    Music: -

    ReplyDelete
  76. Its their resto/bar so they have the right to refuse entry, I don't see the issue why bother going to a place where its already clearly have signs that cross dressing is not allowed unless you think that your so special must be exempted from the rule, beside Aruba bar is a crappy bar with or without the rules.

    ReplyDelete
  77. It still surprises me just how many people are so ignorant of LGBT politics. They still cannot differentiate gender from sexuality, and they could not grasp the full concept of gender dysphoria.

    To those who criticize BB for saying she is a woman because she "is a man (i.e. Rustom)": try obtaining some brains and start reading scientific studies on the matter (if your brain cells could comprehend these).

    What we have here is not a case of being physically a man or woman. It is not a case of homosexuality. It is a case of the transgendered. This is scientific FACT. Gender reassignment has been a long-studied subject, and it involves in-depth psychology research, review, and the like. Gay men and women are different from transgendered's. It is not a choice.

    Of course, that may be a concept too intelligent to be comprehended by some, so then we can always go the other route:

    Even IF this were a choice, which it is not, then as BB said: so is faith. So is political ideology. So is scholastic background. Let's see a bar like Aruba try and post a "No Muslims" or "No Jews" or "No Protestants" or "No Democrats" or "No Republicans" or "No Ateneans" policy. Maybe they are within their (current) rights, but just watch and see the backlash on any of that.

    This is why there are anti-discrimination laws around the world, and this is why the Philippines is not progressing. "Kaya hindi tayo umusad-usad," it's not because of "pagpipilit ng ayaw." It's because of backward thinking when the rest of the world is already far ahead - a world where discriminatory establishments are fined by the state.

    To give credit to Aruba, yes - perhaps as with any establishment they have the right to set up their own policies. They also have the right to display what kind of a$$es they are.

    And ideology and beliefs notwithstanding, it shows poor business judgment indeed. At a time when acceptance of diversity is becoming more and more relevant and widespread across the globe and even in the country, they've just closed off a very powerful and highly-moneyed market: the LGBT community.

    ReplyDelete
  78. Everything you wrote in your blog hits the narrow minded people of that bar and restaurant with slaps in their faces!! I can't believe that amidst the currrent fast chaging world we have, i can still find one pathetic place where one's right, identity, and lifestyle is discriminated!!

    I give you my support all the way and all your STRAP SISTERS will stand up with you in this fight!!

    Mcrae

    ReplyDelete
  79. arghhh!!! naiinis na ko ha!!! so meaning ung mga lesbyana na nagsusuot panlalake bawal din dyan sa ARUBITCH na yan? e kaya pala talagang lalangawin! ahahaha ang kukulet nyo! DISKRIMINASYON nga yan! DIS-KRI-MI-NAS-YON! ok?! umayos nga kayo!

    naka! BB magpatayo ka rin sarili mong bar tas lagyan mo rin code na "NO ARUBA OWNER and its AFFILIATION ALLOWED" :-D hahahaha!

    WORLD PEACE!!!! :-D LOL

    ReplyDelete
  80. BB please don't u ever dare say that u wer raised up as a christian because if you are you should'nt be acting like that as you have to have knowledge of what the bible speaks...you can never see any passage in the Bible that God was pleased with a third sex or ever created one except that they where all burned. He just made Adam and Eve no BB gandanghari.
    And the one you claim that thou shalt love thy neighbors doesnt mean and can NEVER be in any way be applicable in your situation with the aruba bar...im not a gay hater.peace!

    ReplyDelete
  81. i agree with Poks..pwede naman cguro pumasok ang gays dressed accordingly as a man right?

    and bb,BIOLOGICALLY YOU ARE STILL A MAN.unless aminin mo ngpa sex change ka na and legally declared as a woman?!

    ReplyDelete
  82. BB, just accept that life is unfair. It will never be fair. Just accept it and move on. It's easier that way. Rules are rules.

    ReplyDelete
  83. This is not to side on Aruba but just making a point, why they have some rules. If you let it get to that point and change Aruba's policy, it won't be that simple. As it involves some responsibilities (legal or otherwise). Anyone dressed up differently will attract attention. If BB or anyone gets discriminated or abused the management will be responsible for it.

    BB, you should get the management to have their say on this.

    Your personal change has nothing to do with their business or anyone else's. That's just how the world goes. You've travelled around the world and you've been to places like New York or even Paris, so what's the difference. There are restaurants in those places who won't take anyone if you are not dressed properly.

    Some things you can't be change easily because you wanted to, so you either just lump it or follow the rules. But your changes are yours and good on yah! It just goes to show women are appreciated, emulating one is not easy and having a monthly period cramp is even worst.

    ReplyDelete
  84. bottom line merong dress code ang aruba bar...so sinusunod nila ang code na nilagay nila sa labas ng bar...kong marunong kayong mag sunod...di wag nyo ng palakihin ang isyu...

    ReplyDelete
  85. aruba is a private place. kung anong rules meron sila bakit di na lang natin sundin porke't mayayaman kayo? anong diskriminasyon ang pinagsasabi nyo? bakit ang ibang rules ng bar ay nasusunod, yung cross-dresssing hindi? at kelan ka nagiging babae? ka'cheapan lng 'tong ginagawa mo, kakahiya. MGA OA!!!

    ReplyDelete
  86. Look at the issue from this viewpoint: 99.9% of establishments in Makati does not allow smokers inside. If you are a smoker, you are barred from entering these establishments. If you want to enter, don't smoke. If you want to smoke, go elsewhere.

    Now, substitute "crossdressers" and "smokers" in the above paragraph. Does it make sense?

    This issue, in my opinion, is a NON-ISSUE.

    ReplyDelete
  87. I'm just thinking, however special your case may be (more X chromosomes than Y, or ambiguous genitalia), you were previously KNOWN as a man.

    Now, disinformation aside, Aruba implemented a dress code wherein they specifically put "no cross-dressing".

    EVERYONE knows you were a man, and NOW they see you dressed up as a woman.

    ERGO, cross-dressing.

    Do you expect people to keep track of everybody else's condition? "Ah si Jones, ganito pala yan, exempted yan." "Ah eto si ano, ganito naman yan, ok yan." and so on... Or maybe because of your celebrity status, you feel that you had the right to be exempted from such rules?

    Food for thought.

    ReplyDelete
  88. ^^ mali ka. kaya hindi umuusad ang pilipinas eh dahil sa mga taong sarado ang utak na tulad mo. tama si miss BB na kailangan ng magbago ng pilipinas now na! unfortunately miss BB kahit gano ka kaganda at kafashionista eh nakatira ka sa isa sa pinaka judgemental at homophobic na country. ang mga taong tulad niyan ang dapat pinagbabaril sa luneta eh! go miss BB, kailangan natin ang mga empowered woman na katulad mo sa bansa natin!

    ReplyDelete
  89. "I dressed up as a woman because I am a woman. If I dressed up in a masculine way, that would be the time that I would be crossdressing."

    Then bakit naging issue sa iyo ang cross-dressing? If you really think and believe na babae ka, dapat hindi ka nangamba na baka hindi ka papasukin at dapat ipinaglaban mo na babae ka talaga. Unless ikaw mismo sa may doubt sa sarili mo kung babae ka nga talaga.

    ReplyDelete
  90. Rules are rules. Just because you are a celebrity does not mean you get to have a special treatment. I do not see anything wrong with the owner or the bouncer's decision. It's not discrimination. It's just a dress code, it does not have anything to do with human rights or the principles of humanity. Live with it. It's not the end of the world just because you weren't able to watch the show.

    ReplyDelete
  91. since nangyari yung kay inday garutay di na ako pumupunta doon not that im cross dresser but just a support....

    ReplyDelete
  92. You're right....it's time for change. This world is so heterosexual that it becomes homophobic to the extent. I really hate about it. Aruba bar is a manifestation of intolerant homophobia. Dapat ipasara ang ganyang klaseng mga bar! Kakaloka!

    Sya nga pala ate Bb, ngayon ko pa lang navisit ang blog mo. Alam mo gandang-ganda ako sa'yo. You should represent the Philippines to the Miss International Queen pageant in Thailand.

    ReplyDelete
  93. If Im not mistaken, Olsen Racela of San Miguel Beermen co-owns Aruba, IF Im not mistaken....

    ReplyDelete
  94. Tsk. Tsk. Screw 'em BB. You rock! :)

    ReplyDelete
  95. magnolia of Muntinlupa CityApril 27, 2009 at 11:49 PM

    What can i say? ..to the guys who did that to you. Their brain is empty. Gusto lang siguro nilang sumikat just like other bars. With your popularity, I think you are used by them para lang sila mapag usapan... That is not your lost anyway, its them... INGGIT lang sila sayo.. go Bebe!!!

    ReplyDelete
  96. We live in this modern world and yet driscrimination and bigotry is still happening. Such IGNORANCE!!!

    In spite of all that, just continue being yourself, Ms. BB, because a lot of people are rooting for you, including myself. You dare to be true to yourself and that alone is admirable. You are so brave and beautiful that you can't be anything else BUT a woman. *hugs*

    ReplyDelete
  97. another violation: NO HATS OF ANY KIND???? what do they think of their bar-- CHURCH???

    ReplyDelete
  98. no sleeveless, no shorts, no sandals for guys...diba kung iisipin mo..anti-men nga yung club...eh yung cross dressing...pwede naman straight men magsuot nun kung may fetish or trip..pero alam mo nang bawal magcross dress kahit straight ka pa or self proclaimed "woman"...bakit mo pa pipilitin...rules are rules...

    ReplyDelete
  99. i was about to go to bed when i heard of this article in news central. i just had to look it up and react to this. i've seen this discrimination in aruba first hand a couple of years ago. i was with a couple of co-workers... one of them being transgendered. she too had been denied entrance to the bar because of her clothing preference. my friend didn't want to make a scene so we went to another bar instead. to tell you the truth, i didn't give a crap about who rustom is until he announced on national tv that he's gay. i know it takes a lot to come out so he has earned my respect for being that much brave. i'm a straight woman. my bestfriend's bisexual. he's been the closet type for years until recently, he decided to finally come out. i may not share his sexual orientation but that doesn't change how i see him as a person. it breaks my heart every single time i see him hurting over something bad someone said about him being the way he is. i don't have beef with gay people pero alam ko wala akong magagawa kung hindi pa handang tanggapin ng buo ng macho culture society natin na may mga bakla sa mundo..."to each his own" so hindi ko kayo papakielaman jan...you don't necessarily have to agree to their actions. pero sana naman maisip nyo na kahit iba kumpara sa pananaw nyo yung outlook nila sa buhay, tao yang mga yan... and like any other human being in this planet, nasasaktan rin sila. BEING GAY DOESN'T MAKE THEM A BAD PERSON so sana wag nyo naman iparamdam sakanila na excluded sila. PEOPLE, you gotta learn how to treat your fellow human beings better. R-E-S-P-E-C-T-! BB, i feel for you girl!

    ReplyDelete
  100. Nakakainsulto yang ginawa nila not because who you are but inflicting that Philippines is still far behind from maturity,I condemn you in the highest form of hatred ARUBA Resto n Bar and Hoping you will meet your end up to the extend of getting bankrupt,you owe the Filipino people an apology.Damn YOU ARUBA

    ReplyDelete
  101. i agree with what you said on your blog entry. I respect your views as well as your whole being. I just think that those people who are against your womanhood don't know what you've been through. Gender is also a state of mind. If one believes that she is a woman, then we should respect that. And by respecting, it doesn't mean that we tolerate it. Respect is just a way to show that we recognize them. And if people still disagrees, maybe they should introspect their views and remember that we are the makers of our society.

    ReplyDelete
  102. u know BB i am a woman but still i feel incomplete though i have a bf whom i love and loves me too. Maybe because i want to do something but still can't do it anytime soon, like to be engaged or just being near to him. i believe its not the gender that would make u feel complete, just for as long as you do what you want then that would be all.

    ReplyDelete
  103. That's plain idiotic.If you weren't famous you definitely would've gotten in and I bet they would've been eating out of your foot as they try to get you to go home with them lol
    Girl, if you ever come to new york hit me up and I'll bring you around town where no dumbass homophobic places like that could ever stay open lol

    much love,
    Stephen:D

    ReplyDelete
  104. BB- being oneself is never a crime, alam nating lahat na sa mata ng diyos pantay-pantay tayo, for as long as wala kang tinatapakan at inaargabyado, these stupid peoples dont have any rights to do such things, matagal ng issue ito, why do they have to force people to dress nor act the way they wanted, anong karapatan nila na BAGUHIN ang ibang tao, they themselves are NOT perfect, so why should they act like GOD para utusan ang isang taong gusto lang magsaya at magenjoy, na baguhin ang sarili para sa kanila....

    Ikayayaman ba nila yun? ikagaganda ba yun ng BAR nila?, since when naging issue yun sa mga BAR...


    this stupidity must be stopped..... WAKE UP!

    ReplyDelete
  105. truly an eye opener this blog, eh?! i never liked aruba bar and resto..much more now because they discriminate people????. Im not a big fan though (4 the record)..but i kinda know how it feels to be disappointed that night. good idea this blogging thingy..u were able to point out what ure really made of.. kudos for being a TRUE HUMAN BEING..im afraid to say that the owner of Aruba Bar is not..and im in rage to even think that they belong to the human race at all..You guys should go to Mindanao and be with the Abusayafs..

    ReplyDelete
  106. BB i admire your courage! you are a good example to the GAY COMMUNITY. Keep it up! Soon i'll open to my Parents. You are an inspiration!

    ReplyDelete
  107. hey BB... dapat respetohin ka nila... kahit na ganyan ka... masyado ko nila tinatapaktapakan... damn... basta just ignor kung anu cnasabi nila sau... heheheh just be brave of urself...christian from hk

    ReplyDelete
  108. probably the dress code was made not to discriminate but to attract or sustain the bar's target market. they allow entry to gay persons dressed "appropriately." if they allowed entry to bbgandanghari and not to other cross-dressers, that would have been discriminating.

    bbgandanghari's gender is a woman as she says, but still her sex is male and that qualifies her as a crossdresser.

    ReplyDelete
  109. my sympathy is yours. i had watched about this on TV

    ReplyDelete
  110. Ewan ko ba, so are we saying na wala na dapat mga rules and pabayaan na lang natin gawin ng kahit na sino ang gusto nila? Kaya nga chaotic ang mundo dahil sa mga tao na naniniwala na dapat kung ano yung gusto nila, yun ang nasusunod. Hindi na dapat sisihin ang Aruba, shempre yung mga business man non, pinagplanuhan at pinag-isipang mabuti ang mga gagawin nila para lang ma-establish ang business na yon, so dapat ba, ng dahil lang sa isang Rustom Padilla, na nag-iinarteng "ay babae na ako ngayon" eh dapat mabago ang takbo ng buhay ng mga tao doon sa establishment na yon? Katulad nga ng sinulat ng isang commenter dito, may mga bagay na hindi mo dapat ipinagpipilitang mabago just because you have...isipin mo na lang ang kahihiyang dinala mo sa sarili mo dahil lang sa issue na to...sa ngayon may mga taong ang tingin sa iyo ay isang bakla na nag-iinarte at nagmumukha kang katawa-tawa. walang issue sa pag-tanggi nila sa iyo, hindi yon a matter of discrimination, may responsibilidad sila sa lahat ng paying customers doon at higit sa lahat, ikaw na mismo ang nagsabi sa blog mo, apprehensive kang pumasok, kase nga BB, alam mong lalaki ka at dapat tanggapin mo sa sarili mo na hindi magbabago ang ikot ng mundo ng nasa paligid mo just to adjust to you. yung pagbabago ng pilipinas na sinasabi mo, hindi qualified sa gusto mong iparating, kase rule ng Aruba bar ang gusto mong mabago, hindi pangungurakot ng mga pulitiko, kung may gusto kang mabago sa thinking ng mga pilipino, tignan mong maigi ang sarili mo sa salamin at tignan mo kung ano ang itsura mo ngayon saka mo sabihin na dapat magbago ang thinking ng mga pinoy...hindi ka kaiba sa karamihan nila...wala kang sinasabing kaso dito...isa ka lang baklang nag-iinarte, hoping na matanggap ka ng mga tao because of this blog...you may be successfull, pero ang totoo, you know in you, hindi ka pa rin matatanggap ng maraming tao...grow up rustom...

    ReplyDelete
  111. In response to the person questioning BB's Christian upbringing, I just find that a very lousy ignorant argument. You really think straight people have the monopoly on Christianity? I really don't want to turn this into a religious argument but I really detest people who try to beat others down with the bible. You are just a hater, you are not a follower of Jesus. Try reading the new testament with open eyes next time. Now the real issue is whether the said rule amounts to discrimination or not. Certainly all those rules amount to some form of discrimination or other. One has to distinguish between fair and unfair discrimination. Not allowing people with sandals, slippers or flip-flops is discrimination too, yet is does not unfairly prejudice a certain part of the population based on race, gender, or sexual preference, only those wearing them at the time, a quick change of shoes remedies the situation. Its a general rule, clearly to attract more formal clientele and would certainly be fair discrimination. However, by not allowing cross dressing you are indirectly discriminating against all transgendered persons based on their gender. It is very different situation to people wearing sandals. Its not fair to expect someone who is 100% woman in heart and mind to dress like a man just so the rest of the population feel secure in their little perfect straight world. It would be similar to the old days when woman were not allowed to enter many males-only establishments, because they were deemed to be only fit for the kitchen. Its the same as not allowing someone based on their race to enter, as if they are second class citizens. The purpose of the rule is to keep one part of the population out. This is fundamentally discriminatory. Should one just accept rules as they are even if they are fundamentally discriminatory? An extreme example might be the treatment of Jews leading up to World War II in Nazi Germany, is it wise to just obey the rule blindly. Or perhaps one should accept the discriminatory treatment of overseas Philippines in foreign countries, who are often also treated like second class citizens? My point is that rules are always subject to greater principles. If a rule is designed to unfairly discriminate against any part of the population without any justified cause it does not amount to law and should never be tolerated by the citizens. Law always has to be just. This 'crossdressing' rule should go, or else the bar should go. The transgendered people of the Philippines are here to stay, whether you might like it or not. This is their country too, and they have a right to occupy it in the same manner as any straight person. Keep fighting the good fight, BB!

    Chris

    ReplyDelete
  112. you can never say you are a woman because forever kang wlang matris...bading ka as in bading period...isa kang hangal na bading

    ReplyDelete
  113. you will see what you're seeing if you think you're seeing it.

    if you look at it from a different perspective you might see some positive reason behind it.
    if you think it is discrimination, then you'd really see it as discrimination.
    if you think gays or lesbians are unacceptable, then you'd see them as unacceptable.

    why not look at it as (aruba's or other establishments that do not allow crossdressers) precaution to avoid further discrimination to their gays or lesbians customers? why not think of it as their way of protecting your other human rights (not just the freedom to express yourself)?

    and why not look at the fact that gays/lesbians are already part of our community and share equal rights with us? they're also human, who just chose to be true to themselves and want to live an honest life.

    ReplyDelete
  114. Hello BB, I feel so sorry that this happened to you in this day and age, and in a place as urban and supposedly open as Manila. As long as you hold your head up and dignity intact you will be fine. I will be praying for change as well. I wish you all the best!

    ReplyDelete
  115. why is that most of the people hate GAYS?? Paulit ulit na lang din tong pagtatalong ito..Bkt ndi na lang ntn hayaan ang mga sinasabi nyong BAKLANG SALOT na yan dito sa mundo ntn..NEVER NMAN DINISCRIMINATE NG DYOS ANG MGA TAONG NILIKHA NYA..kht ano or sino ka pa..Why the need to exert effort bashing these people???Why let it consume your energy and time? 2 things: One is to make us all notice you..and TWO: Ndi ka LOGICAL na tao..Ang gusto mo lang eh batuhin ang iba dahil ndi sia kabilang sa gender ng Pilipinas or might as well ng buong mundo.
    READ THIS THOUGHT:
    Why do people still go to this place (ARUBA)? We need to boycott it and close it for good! It's a horrible bigoted place! Did people not learn anything from the Inday Garutay incident? Why is this establishment still up and not razed to the ground? We should do it the way the 15th century dudes did it, storm it at night with pitchforks and spears and torches!

    You know, just for kicks, I'd like to see a very high profile, highly respected politician or foreign male leader come in that bar in a dress. Let's see if they still turn him away.

    MAGING MAKATAO KAYO.LHAT AY MAY KARAPATAN AT PUWANG DITO SA LIPUNAN. WAG KAYO MAKASARILI. NDI LANG NMAN C BB ANG LUMANTAD SA PUBLIKO NA BAKLA CYA. She also wants a peaceful mind.. and that she wants to be a GIRL. Leave her out of that. HINDI NMAN NYA KAYO INAAPAKAN SA DESISYON NYANG UN. Leave her alone people.

    ReplyDelete
  116. jusko padagdag ng padagdag ang nababasa kong makikitid ang utak dine LOL magbasa nga kayo ng maige sa kinuwentong pangyayari ha!

    si BB gustong magpunta sa ARUBITCH bcos of Rannie Raymundo's show, at ndi nga nya daw alam na me kagaguhang "no cross dressing" code pala naman ang ARUBITCH na yan, kaya naman nag worry sya na kahit kini claim nya sa sarili nya na babae sya na baka ndi sya papasukin e sa napaka simpleng dahilan, sikat kse sya! artista! kontrobersyal ang pagiging BB nya! e jusko sa tingin mo ba kung yan e ordinaryong cross dresser lang na tipong kasing ganda rin ni BB na di mo mapagkakamalang isang male pala, pustahan makakapasok yan! (not unless kung ang guard e me angking "gaydar" talent LOL) gets mo na?! kung sino man ung nag Q kung bakit nabahalang pumasok ang ating Queen BB... e sa tingin nyo kung yan e iinom lang ng isang tasang kape o isang basong palamig magpupumilit pa ba yang pumasok sa ARUBITCH na yan kung alam naman nyang me ka bullshitan na code?!..at buti nga na encounter ni BB ang experience na to para matigil na ang kabulastugan na pang di discriminate na yan e! isa itong DISKRIMINASYON! baket? ok,,, yang dress code dress code na yan, bawal ang tsinelas, bawal ang sando or shorts etc. yan ok yang mga yan! syempre disenteng lugar kaya dapat nasa ayos din ang suot mo, e ang maglagay ng "no cross dressing"? itatak nyo nga sa makipot nyong utak mga kontra kayo na ndi lang basta basta damit ang pinag uusapan dito kungdi ang PAGKA TAO! tulad nga ng nasabi ko sa taas, papano ang mga lesbians na nagsusuot panlalake? bawal din sila? (naku Aiza Seguerra warning lang, bawal ka rin dyan sa ARUBITCH na yan! LOL) kaya dapat lang talaga na i boycott na yan kung mga pasaway rin lang naman! at isa pa, sasabihin nyo madami ng problema ang pinas h'wag ng dagdagan pa ng ganitong ka artehan? e kung ituwid kaya muna natin ang mga masasamang pag uugali natin? kung umayos kaya muna tayo sa ating pagkakapwa tao?

    ....kaya tulad na rin ng sinabi ni ren at ni Anna Laureen Chavez, RESPERTO lang at MAGING MAKATAO sana tayong lahat!...

    again...WORLD PEACE! :-D

    ReplyDelete
  117. they dont have the right to do that! because we are free in this world... being a gay is not a Sin...only if u do nasty acts to tolerate it...u have the right to do what u want to do as long as u are not stepping nor hurting other person's foot! that kind of policy is one of the examples of discremanation and shouldnt be tolerated!

    ReplyDelete
  118. My favorite comments are those who are full of vitriol against BB then ends their statements with "im not against gays". WTF? wow.

    Rules? Kaya me rules para hindi chaotic? Ano pang tawag mo sa nangyayari sa mundo? Understanding one another is the key to stopping chaos.

    never heard of this bar before but now I do. Thanks BB!

    ReplyDelete
  119. Nakakainis ang argument ng mga mangmang na Pinoy! definitely, you just hate people different from you. Get real bitches, kahit may matris kayo, women are given the same raw deal in this freaking world! Kaya nga nagsasalita si BB to put an end to this discrimanory practice? And you bitches what have you done to stop the raping and objectification of women?

    ReplyDelete
  120. actually, i was shocked wen i heard that u were not able to watch the show of ur friend randy because of that discriminating rules like the NO crossDRESSING policy, but you know, from this blog u've already got ur point and im so amazed by the way you commented on what u felt by those people behind that bar who treated you and other woman who happened to be a man based on their gender when they were born as well not right... what they've did to you is a very good example of restricting you of your liberty as well as others...

    ReplyDelete
  121. Walang ipinagkaiba yan sa: NO ID NO ENTRY rules.

    Pls don't compare yourself to Rosa Parks. She was discriminated but she fought for her right by not giving up her seat. Eh ikaw me alalay na syang nagpipilit na papasukin ka. You should have explained to them yourself na babae ka at hindi crossdresser...but you couldn't.

    Doctors don't assign the babies' gender. Don't be shy to admit that you are gay - be proud of it! No matter how thick the make-up you put on or kahit 10 yrs kang mag ballet, you will never be a woman.

    ReplyDelete
  122. To the person who posted something along the lines of, "Change 'No Cross-Dressing' with 'No Smoking,'" is following a misaligned comparison. This is apples to oranges.

    As I posted previously, a more apt comparison would be, change "No Cross-Dressing" with "No Muslims" or "No Protestants" or "No Jews." Or "No Irishmen" or "No Africans" or "No Republicans" or "No Women" or "No Men."

    See what happens to an establishment that posts such a policy. Such is the kind of thinking that led to Nazi Germany and World War II. I'm just saying.

    There's your true food of thought.

    ---

    To the person questioning BB's Christian upbringing and who believes straights have a monopoloy on Christianity, remember the following:

    1. King David and his best friend Jonathan, with their commitment documented
    2. Jesus preferred the company of tax collectors, prostitutes, and others considered to be sinners than the company of Pharisees
    3. Let who is without sin cast the first stone.
    4. Judge not that ye be not judged.

    ReplyDelete
  123. In my country, and I think most 1st world countries in the world (I'm not sure where the Philippines lies on this) a transgendered person certainly can go though re-assignment surgery and have her status changed from male to female. Thus the law will view her 100% as a woman. So it is absolutely NOT true that if you are born a male you will always be a male. The law recognizes that gender is a state of mind and NOT just about physical appearance. The magic of life is that it creates everyone to be unique. Nature does not spit out little ignorant cloned sheep that all follow the same lifestyle, each one of us are all born to be different. If you are meant to be straight, married, have 3 kids, lots of grand kids and then pass away peacefully, then so be it. But this is not what everyone is supposed to be, by nature. We are meant to be different for very good reason, its the magic of life's diversity. If nature gave you a woman's mind in a mans body it would be against natures choice to try change your mind to something you are not. In life the only thing worthwhile being is yourself. Being something you are not is shameful. BB, like so many transgendered persons are only being what they are meant to be. They are not hypocrites like some others who like to comment here. They are true people who despite many of their fellow Filipino's disdain, despite their harsh treatment in society are being true to their hearts. Rock on BB!

    Chris

    ReplyDelete
  124. Wow! this post created quite a stir. We have a lot of people going at each other, trying to prove that they are right. But who can really say what is right or wrong? Does anyone have the right to say that they are right?

    I think the concept of right or wrong is just a reflection of what's accepted by the majority. Society has never been kind to those considered as "aberrations". History has proven this.

    My question now is, will we ever achieve equality? I mean true equality and not the BS "equality" concept that we have. This may be a far fetched idea and I am not very optimistic that I am going to witness this during my lifetime. How sad...

    ReplyDelete
  125. I kinda disappointed because some people criticize "us" and not accept for who we are...tao rin naman tayo na nabubuhay at gumagala sa mundong ibabaw..i hope someday people will jugde us for who we are..

    take care :D
    God bless
    I luv your blog :p

    ReplyDelete
  126. Someone commented: "Doctors don't assign the babies' gender. Don't be shy to admit that you are gay - be proud of it! No matter how thick the make-up you put on or kahit 10 yrs kang mag ballet, you will never be a woman."

    Whats the whole point here? Mejo DENSE yta ang eksplanasyon mo at nakakalito.. Atleast BB knows where she stands..She knows when and where to act like one..Its not her fault that the bar itself has this stupid sign "no crossdresser" however, BB wasnt afraid to ASK courteously if they would allow her to go in. I think she had said enough and people are being so unfair about her. Give her a break..Kya nga lumantad na cya sa publiko kasi nga shes not afraid to say SHES A WOMAN now..Yes, youre right..she will never be a WOMAN by your standard but from all of us who believes that every human being has the right to do the things we wanna do..and the things that we belive is right..Then thats enough justification to oneself to go on living in this hell hole..

    ReplyDelete
  127. whoa!!!lots of comments!haha your blog is doing great as soon as i heard you have a blog i searched it immediately and voila here i am.

    when you first came out as a crossedresse,i was shocked and disappointed because i thought u just want to be gay hehe not being so girly,pero now i kinda getting use to it na and like you in the process.

    i think,you already said whats about to say,and people got your message,just get it over with and just list down bars and establishments that dont allow cross dressing and dont go there period as simple as that.its their lost anyway!

    ReplyDelete
  128. go girl..you rock...cheers

    ReplyDelete
  129. Acceptance is the only solution!

    If we are simply gonna refuse to enter every place that dont want us, we get nowhere, we become prisoners in our own country. Locked away from societies eyes for being who we are. Its our rights that we should fight for. If we condone this discrimination we are simply setting ourselves up for the next time, to be treated badly, again and again.

    If we remain quiet, we loose. If we make a noise we invite their scorn, but its just words. Change is never easy, but it is coming to the Philippines. We know our cause is just. We know that they can never out reason us, because their premise is fatally flawed. They think they are better than us, they think they can treat us as inferior and all we want is equal treatment. All we want is acceptance.

    If they think 'no crossdressing' is equal to 'no i.d. no entry' they are very mistaken. We can easily go home to fetch an i.d. but are we expected to go home too and come out straight looking, and being hypocrites so that we can all pretend to live in a happy little straight world? Why dont you try that sometime, go to your home and come out gay and see how people treat you. Lets see if you can bare being something you are not. So why should we!

    Go for it BB. Let's fight for our right. "Transgendered people of the Philippines are here to stay, whether you like it or not." So learn it, live it, love it!

    Nicole M.

    ReplyDelete
  130. Daming issues ng mga Pinoy!

    Ang tingin ko kaya lang hindi pinapasok si Bebe ay sa isang dahilan lang. Saang CR siya papasok? Sa lalaki or sa babae?

    Kahit anong CR ang gamitin niya may magrereklamo na customer. SIYEMPRE HINDI NILA ALAM KUNG ANO SI BB EH!

    Siguro na anticipate na ng Aruba ang ganitong problema. Kaya imbes na ma turn off karamihan ng mga customers, they did what they thought was a proper business decision.

    I was their last week and it was packed to the rafters! So to all haters, you are definitely not their target market.

    Consigliere

    ReplyDelete
  131. People think differently. I think BB is a woman but not everyone agrees to that. This is why she was concerned about the crossdressing policy of the said establishment. She is aware that some people will not accept her as a woman.

    Of course, the establishment has the right to enforce its own rules. However, to follow them blindly is out of the question. Rules are meant to guide us and mold us into accountable persons, not to control our actions. Jesus himself was attacked for breaking the laws of Moses in several instances. He healed on a Sabbath, ate "unclean food" with his disciples, did not wash His hands before eating, etc... I will not fail to mention here the stoning of the woman who committed adultery. Who among is without sin? Let him/her cast the first stone. The point here is that those rules were given to the people to guide and train them to be disciplined. Yes, the no crossdressing policy is easy to follow. BB has no intention of breaking that rule. But because we are so attached to the equation sex=gender, we cannot accept her womanhood. It is definitely discriminating for transgenders. Most of us find this hard to understand because we are not in their shoes. You may think that BB is overreacting. But for someone in her place, the experience is truly hurtful.

    Anyway, just a thought, maybe a thousand years from now, women's clothing would be considered men's by then and vice versa! What sense is there in the no crossdressing policy?

    BB, thank you for writing about your experience. While you may not convince everyone to fully accept you as a woman, as a human, as a child of God, you have accepted yourself. Only God truly knos what you are going through BB. Stay strong and faithful.

    Mandee

    ReplyDelete